爱是想触碰、又收回手?-同文馆Quora精选

爱是想触碰又收回手?有人认为爱是性、是婚姻、是清晨六点的吻、是一堆孩子,也许真是这样的,莱斯特小姐。但你知道我怎么想吗?我觉得爱是想触碰又收回

爱是想触碰又收回手?





有人认为爱是性、是婚姻、是清晨六点的吻、是一堆孩子,也许真是这样的,莱斯特小姐。但你知道我怎么想吗?我觉得爱是想触碰又收回手。——塞林格 《破碎故事之心》

 

维基百科给“爱”做出了这样的定义:爱,可说是衍生自亲人之间的强烈关爱、忠诚及善意的情感与心理状态,如母爱。亦可为衍生自性欲与情感的吸引力,例如情人之间的情爱与温柔。此外,亦可能衍生自尊敬与钦佩之情,例如朋友之间彼此重视与欣赏。同时,爱被认为是一种神奇的力量。


这本书是Quora“爱是什么(What is love?)”这一问题获赞最多的答案合集。这个问题至今都在源源不断地接收新答案。爱或许就是我们从亲情、爱情、友情中汲取的“神奇力量”,爱也或许单纯如塞林格所言——“想触碰,又收回手。”

 

爱是什么呀(中英双语版)

作者 Quora

译者 艾华 非非


回答者:Grace Ng,Javelin.com联合创始人


我发现,孩子们对于这个问题的思考有时会非常有趣且令人动容。

 

一组专业人士向一群四至八岁的儿童提出了这个问题:“爱是什么呢?”


孩子们的答案出人意料,比一般人所想的更加宽广和深远。



“奶奶得了关节炎以后就没法儿弯腰涂脚指甲油了。爷爷每次都帮奶奶涂,即便他的手也得了关节炎。这就是爱。”——蕾贝卡,8岁

 

“当一个人爱你的时候,他喊你名字的方式会变得不同。你就是知道,自己的名字在他的嘴里是很安全的。”——比利,4岁

 

“爱就是女孩儿喷上香水,男孩儿擦上须后水,他们走到外面,去闻彼此身上的味道。”——卡尔,5岁

 

“爱就是出去吃饭的时候,你把你的炸薯条分一大半给别人,而不需要他们也把自己的给你作为交换。”——克里斯,6岁

 

“爱就是你累的时候让你微笑的东西。”——特里,4岁

 

“爱就是妈咪给爹地泡咖啡的时候,会先尝一口,觉得味道不错再给他。”——丹尼,7岁

 

“爱就是你们老是在亲吻。等你们亲够了,你们还是想和对方待在一起,想要更多地聊天。我的妈咪和爹地就是那样的。他们亲吻的时候看上去有点恶心。”——艾米丽,8岁

 

“爱就是圣诞节在屋子里陪伴着你的东西。如果你停止拆礼物,仔细听,就能感受到。”——波比,7岁(哇塞!)

 

“如果你想学着爱得更好,你就该从爱一个你讨厌的朋友开始做起。”——尼卡,6岁(我们这个星球需要成千上万像尼卡这样的人)

 

“爱就是你告诉他你喜欢他的衬衫,他就天天都穿着它。”——诺尔,7岁

 

“爱就是,一个老爷爷和一个老奶奶,尽管已经那么了解对方,他们还是好朋友。”——汤米,6岁

 

“在我的钢琴独奏会上,我在舞台上,心里很害怕。我看了一眼台下,观众们都看着我。人群中我看到了爸爸,只有他微笑着朝我挥手。然后我就不再害怕了。”——辛迪,6岁

 

“妈咪是世界上最爱我的人。再没有别人会每天晚上吻我入睡。”——克莱尔,6岁

 

“爱就是尽管妈咪看到爹地浑身汗兮兮、臭乎乎的,却仍然说他比罗伯特·雷德福都帅。”——克里斯,7岁

 

“爱就是你把狗狗丢下一整天,它还是跑过来高兴地舔你的脸。”——玛丽安,4岁

 

“我知道我姐姐爱我,因为她把她所有旧衣服都给我穿,自己只好跑去买新的。”——劳伦,4岁

 

“当你爱一个人的时候,你的睫毛会上下忽闪,星星会从你的眼睛里跑出来。”——卡伦,7岁

 

“爱就是妈咪看到爹地上厕所却不觉得恶心。”——马克,6岁

 

“如果你不是真心的,你就不应该随随便便把‘我爱你’挂嘴边。而如果你是真心的,你就应该经常把这句话说出来。不然人们容易忘记。”——杰西卡,8岁

 

到了最后一个。

 

答案的胜者是一个四岁的小男孩。他家隔壁邻居是位新近丧妻的老先生。男孩儿看到这位老先生在哭,于是跑到他的院子里,爬上他的大腿,就那么坐在那儿。


当他妈妈问他都跟老先生说了什么的时候,小男孩儿回答:“什么都没说,我只是在帮他哭。”

 

Answer by: Grace Ng, Co-Founder, Javelin.com


I just found this, it's pretty touching and interesting to see how kids think about this subject.


A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, ‘What does love mean?’


The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined:


‘When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That’s love..’.Rebecca- age 8


‘When someone loves you,The way they say your name is different.You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.’.Billy - age 4


‘Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.’ .Karl - age 5


‘Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.’ .Chrissy - age 6


‘Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.’ .Terri - age 4


‘Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.’ .Danny - age 7


‘Love is when you kiss all the time.. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that.. They look gross when they kiss’ .Emily - age 8


‘Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.’.Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)


‘If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,’.Nikka - age 6 (we need a few million more Nikka’s on this planet)


‘Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.’.Noelle - age 7


‘Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.’ .Tommy - age 6


‘During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling.


He was the only one doing that. I wasn’t scared anymore..’ .Cindy - age 8


‘My mommy loves me more than anybody You don’t see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night..’.Clare - age 6


‘Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.’.Chris - age 7


‘Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.’.Mary Ann - age 4


‘I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.’ .Lauren - age 4


‘When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.’ Karen - age 7


‘Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn’t think it’s gross.’.Mark - age 6


‘You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it.. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.’ .Jessica - age 8


And the final one


The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman’s yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there.


When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, ‘Nothing, I just helped him cry’



回答者:Jyothsna Seetharam,一团杂乱的原子集合体



我觉得,鲍勃·马力给出了对于“爱”的最好诠释。


“我坚信,一生只有一次,你会找到一个人,彻底颠覆你的世界。


你向他倾诉从未和别人吐露的秘密,他全心全意听你诉说,怎么也听不够。


你向他倾吐对未来的希望,那些从未到达的目标和永远不会实现的梦,以及那些生活迎头扔给你的失望。


当好事发生,你迫不及待地跟他分享,知道他会为你的欢乐而欢乐。


当你受伤时,他陪你一起哭泣,当你出丑时,他同你一起大笑,丝毫不会觉得尴尬和难堪。


他绝对不会伤害你的感情,让你觉得自己不够好;相反,他会帮助你树立信心,帮你看到自己的优势,让你知道你是那么的特别和美丽。


当他伴你左右,你不会感觉到丝毫的压力、妒忌或是竞争感;只有安静的沉着感包裹着你。


你可以就做你自己,不用担心他怎么想你,因为他爱着的就是原原本本的你。


那些别人眼中微不足道的小事,一条留言,一首歌,一段散步,于你而言都是无价的财宝,于心灵深处珍藏永远。


童年的记忆清晰而生动地浮现,仿佛你重获年轻。


所有色彩仿佛都变得更加明亮闪耀。


从前你的生活里鲜有欢笑,而今你每天都欢笑连连。


漫长的一天,繁重的工作,只要一两个电话就能帮你渡过,让你重拾笑容。


无需过多的交谈,他仅仅是待在你的身边,就能让你足够满足。


那些从前你未感兴趣的事物,也变得那么迷人;因为它们对他来说是那么重要,而他对你来说是那么特别。


你在每一个场合,你做每一件事时,都会想起他。


简简单单的事物也能把他带进你的脑海,像是淡蓝的天空,和煦的风,或是地平线上卷起的乌云


你敞开心扉,明明知道也许有一天你会心碎;但你仍要敞开心扉,于是体会到了从未敢梦想过的爱和喜悦。


真正的喜悦,那么真实,以至于你受到了惊吓;但是你知道,你只有保持着那份脆弱,才能体会到这真正的快乐。


你感觉到力量满满,因为你拥有一位真心朋友,一位灵魂伴侣,将对你忠诚,直到生命尽头。


你的生命改头换面,变得激动人心且价值连城。


他是你生命中的一部分,只有这样,你才能充满希望,倍感安全。”


——鲍勃·马力


Answer by: Jyothsna Seetharam, Addled assemblage of atoms.


This one by Bob Marley defines love the best, I believe...


"Only once in your... life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.”


-Bob Marley




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本文节选自豆瓣阅读同文馆作品《爱是什么呀》



爱是什么呀(中英双语)

作者 Quora

译者 艾华 非非


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